A Beautiful Mess

A Sexual Abuse and Addiction Recovery Blog

Looking for a Trace…

I studied the mirror to find a trace of you.

I turned to the left, tilted my head, smiled, unsmiled…

I locked on my own eyes and it was there that I found you.

RIP Mom

7/4/2011

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I Will Not Give Up

I’ve been sitting here racking my brains trying to utilize tools that I have been given to live a healthy and fruitful life… but I am still kind of floundering with “mom issues”.  I can’t make sense of it in a way that doesn’t deeply pain me.  I am still having a hard time dealing with accepting it for what it was.  I don’t know how to deal with this on my own so I did make an appointment with a therapist.  Just another hoop to jump along my path to recovery and wholeness.  I have faith in the process and I will not give up on myself.

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No Rhyme, No Reason

I am extremely thankful for today.  I am enjoying the solitude and the silence.  An occasional sound of the keys clicking, but for the most part, it’s like a comforting melody to my soul.  In the moment… I feel blessed, grateful, relaxed, contemplative, hopeful, strong and beautiful.

I know my own heart.  I know my own intentions.  I’m truly beginning to become my own friend.  I no longer despise the woman I see in the mirror.  It’s like I’m waking up from a nightmare to find out it was all real.

I survived.

Wow.

That alone, is an amazing statement considering what I have been through.

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Lost My Religion

I look back at my blog and see where I lost my religion, somewhere along the way.  I still consider myself to be very spiritual.  But I look to mother nature, the sun and the beauty all around.  I no longer associate with Christianity.

“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” – Gandhi

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I Like Living.

Blessed Quotes

I like living. Agatha Christie Quote.

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Being My Own Friend – Connecting With the World

When I hit a bump along my recovery journey, I will continue to reference back here:

Connect With Others to Get Friendly With Yourself

Crafting has been very therapeutic for me lately.  Makes for nice gifts and the feeling of creating something so beautiful is validating to my inner child.

 

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Today’s Quote

When you live in the shadow of insanity, the appearance of another mind that thinks and talks as yours does is something close to a blessed event.

Robert Pirsig

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